Freedom Lifestyle Blog

Experiencing PEACE in the Midst of Chaos

We have not been promised a life free of troubles, even if we are Christian. However, being Christian, t.i having a personal relationship with Jesus, means that we can experience PEACE in the midst of those chaotic times that we experience throughout our lifetime. Peace in the midst of times that we feel despair and like we are falling apart on the inside. Peace that surpasses our human understanding in the midst of all storms of life that strike us like a deadly viper. God, the Lord of Peace Himself, offers us this peace because He loves us much more than we could ever imagine; more than anyone here on earth ever could. Have you experienced this peace?

 

I’d like to share with you how God granted me peace in the midst of a very hard time in my life: the death of my wonderful mom, who passed away on May 17th this year (2016), the day I was celebrating my 14th wedding anniversary to my husband, Dana. I saw her health down-spiral quickly after what was supposed to be a minor surgery under her eye, which took place in October of last year. She had been living a much healthier lifestyle since she had moved to California in July of 2012, after the death of my beloved father in Latvia in March of that year. She lost a lot of weight by eating healthier (she cut down a lot of deserts) and by exercising several times a week in the exercise room in the elderly community in which she lived independently, Emerald Court. She struggled with keeping her blood sugar level under control, though, because sugar was still something she craved a lot and she snuck it in more that she thought she did. {Sugar is an anti-nutrient, meaning that it causes the nutrients that we do take into our body not to be as easily absorbed}. However, after the eye surgery she was not able to exercise much and she was taking a lot of antibiotics, through crème form as well as liquid and pill form, which depressed her immune system severely and she was not able to recover. She kept getting infections in her gastrointestinal system, meaning more antibiotics, and her health down-spiraled even more over the next several months.

My mom’s body was left very weak, unable to control her bowels and urine flow. At first she was able to recover and stand on her own walking slowly with a walker, however within just a few weeks she became unable to stand anymore on her own two feet and she mostly just sat in her chair, and the last weeks of her life she simply lay in her bed most of the time, though they did try at least getting her up in her wheelchair for a couple of hours daily. Her body got chronically inflamed on her legs and her abdomen. She ended up in the hospital for 5 days three weeks after Easter, and was in a rehab center for five weeks, until the day she died. The doctors said about a week before her death that there was nothing that they could do for her anymore; that the intervention they were doing did not seem to be helping her in any way. She lost interest in getting up for any activity – the last major one she attended was her granddaughter Emily’s confirmation.

 

Every morning for the five weeks my mom was in the Park Regency Rehab Center I would visit my mom, not knowing whether or not she would be alive that day. I cried a lot on my way over and constantly had the radio on the Christian station listening to peaceful music, and I just talked to God all the time because it kept me calm. I asked that His perfect will be done in her life and daily I thanked Him for one more day to enjoy with her.

 

My family had planned a 4-day cruise ship to Mexico to celebrate my wedding anniversary to my husband, and When the day of our departure arrived, I was not sure if I wanted to go because I didn’t know if I would see my mom alive again when I got back. I told my fears to my mom; she smiled and said “Just go. I’ll be fine.” When I said good-bye that Sunday morning, I kissed her on the cheek as she lay in her bed, peacefully. She had a smile on her lips, but I had tears in my eyes as I left the room. I told her I loved her and she said she loved me too. I prayed that God would send the best care for her during my time away. Two days later, at 1:00 p.m, she started breathing slower and they put on her breathing treatment. She passed away by 2:00 o’clock, soon after my brother John thanked her for all she had done and told her it was okay for her to let go. She had been ready to go to her eternal home for a couple months already, so she was happy to finally be able to do so.

 

I got the news of her death on the cruise ship that evening. I had been wondering each morning how she was doing and just prayed that the Lord would take care of her in whatever way He felt best. When I got the news that He took her home, I knew she was in the best care possible, without a doubt. However, the pain of her absence was hard for me. The next morning I got up early and went to the gym and ran on the treadmill for a half hour, then I went up on the roof of the ship and just cried out to God. It was so hard for me not to have been there when she had left this earth, but I knew in my heart that God wanted it that way so I could understand how both of my aunts and my youngest brother Jim felt, who also could not be there at that time.  I had left it all in God’s hands, for His perfect will do be done – was I going to able to trust Him and be able to accept it? That was truly a test of my trust in Him.

 

It has been over two weeks since my mom died now. I still cry the pain of her absence at times, but then God reminds me how much happier she is now in heaven. He helps me visualize my mom saying with a smile on her face, “It’s okay, Mirdza. I will see you when you get here. It’s so beautiful here!” Those words and that visualization of her face brings a smile to my face and peace to my heart.

 

The pain of my mom’s absence is still very strong, some days more than on others, but the peace that God puts in my heart every morning as I simply let Him know that I am available for Him to use me as He sees fit to continue encouraging others is even stronger. God is good, all the time. My faith in Him and love for Him grows stronger with each passing day. At night when my thoughts start going out of control for one reason or another, I now ask for God to take control of them so I can sleep, and I’ve been able to sleep more soundly for the past couple of nights than I have in many months. I am so grateful for that.

 

As you can see, God has truly granted me peace in the midst of my sorrow as I mourn the death of my mom. He can do the same for you if you are willing to just surrender your life over to Him, without questioning why He allows things to happen. All things somehow work together for good for those of us who love the Lord, as it says in Romans 8:28.